She tries hard to be like Molly

So there I was sitting in my therapists office (of course I need a therapist have you read my other entries?!!) and she asked me a question, she said, “Who do you admire? Who would you most like to be?” I said, “Molly Mormon of course.” And in her wisdom she said, but you are not Molly and the most you can ever hope to be is the very best Bianca you can be.” ..huh

So I explained to her that Molly isn’t an actual person as much as she is an ideal. And she laughed, “Even harder.” she said.

It was in her office that I began to realize that only by loving and appreciating myself for the unique talents and abilities I possess, will I be able to make the same type of contribution that Molly makes. By caring more about what Heavenly Father thinks of me then what others think of me has made me more likely to be the person I want to become, given me more opportunity to serve, more ways to love, and It has become increasingly easier to hear the voice of the Spirit and learn the things I need to know to be successful in whatever mission I have been sent here to do. It simply took out the noise, increased my awareness, ability to forgive, patience with myself and others, and ability to grow. Living with paradox is complicated, it is important to be ok with who we are while at the same time be engaged in pursuing excellence.

Of course it hasn’t made me the most popular person around. Not caring what others think about you has its disadvantages, but I can look myself in the mirror and like what I see when I try just to be me.