Molly Cries

Ok, am I the only one that ever got the impression that Molly is always happy? I’ve never seen her angry or frustrated and she never cries. She maintains composure when she speaks, leaving the crying to the audience members who feel the spirit of her talk, and when the spirit strikes in a touching way she may shed a couple of elegant and sophisticated tears. But crying, like runny nose, tissue won’t hold, uncontrolled sobbing….yea just doesn’t seem to fit her personality. However, according to doctors everywhere crying is good for you. Even if you don’t have a reason. Releasing emotional toxins keeps you healthy and happy. And according to John Gray not releasing them can add inches to your waist. So maybe just maybe Molly cries at least once a month. And that is why we see her always glowing, content and peaceful. But if you are anything like me, and you want to do it with dignity, here are some tips.

1. If you don’t want to cry in public, immediately change your thinking to something positive. This can be difficult at the moment but try thinking of the cutest baby you ever saw, a new puppy, your favorite Christmas or Birthday present etc. And take a deep breath. Then when you get to a safe place, put on some sad music and let it all go.

2. Have a safe person you can cry with, someone who legitimizes the way you feel, no matter how irrational it may seem to you. Someone that knows the value of crying and how it can cleanse the soul, and values your feelings, but wont make you feel worse about the situation either.

3. Give yourself a time limit on heartaches and grief or especially difficult situations. Since, you probably are not going to get it all out in one cry anyway, allow yourself a few minutes (20 minutes or so) a day to let out some of that hurt and pain. Soon you will find that the emptiness is healing and one day you will wake up with no more tears.

4. Give yourself credit. You deserve to fill your cup and sometimes it is about filling up your cup with tears. It doesn’t matter if you can find a reason or not. My dear Uncle Joe use to catch my tears in a jar, I thought it was so fun but the harder I tried to fill up the jar with tears the less tears I had. In the end it is about taking care of yourself, making yourself stronger, nurturing and caring for the feelings you have so that you are better equiped to be careful with the feelings of others.

5. Remember that thoughts proceed feelings so if you need to change your feelings in the moment change your thoughts. But, don’t forget to deal with the situation once you’ve gained control and can speak clearly and rationally. Just like you deserve to cry, you deserve to be treated with respect and standing up for youself  in a composed manner is a talent you will share with Molly.